The Joys of having CF

The Joys of having CF

Friday, February 17, 2012

It's not being brave...It's part of having CF

So i wanted to do a small post about bravery. When i got my PICC line last Friday, i have to admitt it was an expierence i've never had before. I will admitt i was a little scared at first when they had to go to my other arm to do the PICC because of to much scar tissue. I knew that that arm had to much scar tissue, but i had faith. I had faith that it would work...even though i knew it probably wouldnt and was i shocked, mad, dissapointed? Of course!! But i didnt show it. I think thats where the bravery part comes in. When you have an illness or medical illness, in my case CF, you tend to not show your emotions right away. You tend to put on your "brave" face and "go with the flow" as some call it. Some people say i had patience that day, and that i was so brave, and went with the flow. But truth is i was scared. Reality started to hit while i was lying on the table with both my arms out while they had to call the Dr in, reality was/is that CF does really affect you. Why that hit me then i will NEVER know. BUT, all i kept thinking was, this is part of CF, this is MY life, MY reality. Is it hard? ABSOLUTELY. What part of CF isnt? Is it scary? SOMETIMES. And do you have to be brave sometimes even when you dont want to? ALWAYS. BUT, will i ever regret God blessing me with CF? NEVER!!!! I am choosing to live my life, smile when sometimes id like to cry, and be BRAVE even if i dont feel like it because its not about being brave, its just part of having CF

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