More than a Number.
For those who know me know that in general I love celebrations, whether it’s a birthday, a holiday or special occasion. Any reason to celebrate I do.
Those who know me also know that October-December are my absolute favorite months of the year. October because let’s face it here in the Midwest the leaves start turning, and its Fall.
November, because it’s my birthday and Thanksgiving, and December because it’s Christmas.
To me those are the three most wonderful months of the year.
Now we’re into November. My birthday month.
You hear people talk about how age is “just a number”, but to me its way more than that.
November signifies a lot of different meanings for me.
On November 12th I was born…my parents were told four months later that I wouldn’t live to see kindergarten-let alone make it home from the hospital. That right that’s a big label put on someone so young, and from that it grew.
The first 3 years of my life I was in the hospital more than I was out. My mom and I spent more time in a hospital away from my dad and sisters than at home. My mom in those first 3 years…NEVER left my side for a second. My dad worked as much as he could and would visit when he could.
I think of that time “lost” as some would say. But then I look at the time “given” back to make more memories.
In those first 3 years my parents sacrificed everything for me! If it wasn’t for them; my mom staying with me and my dad working so hard to keep insurance for me…I don’t know if I would be here. In those first 3 years, medical staff became family. I came close to spending many holidays in the hospital. Doctors did everything…and for that I am forever grateful.
In 24 years; I’ve had more IV’s, blood draws, tests, x-rays, and antibiotics than one can even count.
Just an example; I’d be in the hospital about 2 weeks of every month…that’s 12 PICC lines in 3 years is approx. 36 PICC line’s by the age of 3, and approx. 2 a year after that so all together we’re looking at approximately 76 PICC lines…is that even possible? I’m probably off on the number but that’s just an idea.
Those roughly 76 PICC lines have literallySAVED my life time and time again, and they continue to keep me healthy so I can keep seeing each next year and making memories, and living as normal life as possible.
For me, November signifies all of the obstacles I’ve overcome. All the statistics I’ve outlived. All the things I was told I couldn’t/shouldn’t do that I’ve done.
Every year is one more year that me and these beautiful lungs have fought…& survived. So for me every year is More than “just” a Number.
Each year is one more year I’ve “beat the odds” as some would say. A few obstacles these lungs and I have overcome so far:
-not making it to Kindergarten
-not making it to 16
-not getting a feeding tube
-not having sinus surgery
-not seeing graduation
You get the point. At this point I don’t look so much as what I’ve overcome rather than what can I achieve next.
Overcoming/outliving statistics is great, but looking ahead is just exciting. I get more excited thinking and dreaming about the future like getting married and having a family. The simple things. All I’ve ever dreamed of is being happy and healthy and living a nice, simple life, and getting to be a wife and hopefully a mom.
My dreams aren’t outrageous. They’re practical. Everyone dreams of them. For me…they hold a special place in my heart & are just a little extra special.
In a few short days I’ll be 24, and I can’t wait to see what this year holds.
“life’s not the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away”
~God Bless
